Women: The mystery decoded

A woman’s mind is often referred to as complex. Men have been trying to understand women … Well, since the beginning of time. Even Stephen Hawking who is said to have one of the most brilliant minds said, “women are a complete mystery.” But it’s not so much that a woman is complex or a mystery. You have to change your way of thinking to understand women. In terms of parenting, say you have two children. One is completely normal and healthy while the other child has ADHD. You love them both the same but to understand your child with ADHD, you have to think differently. You have to think outside the box, right? Women are basically like that. You have to change your thinking completely.

There are a few important key things to keep in mind, the basics or foundation to understanding women. Once you understand the basics you can build on that to help you continue to understand women further and on a deeper level.

First, lets start with listening and guys this is a big one. Listen with your eyes, not your ears. Women may say one thing but often mean something completely different. Pay attention. Look at her facial expression. Watch her body language. Her body language is where you are going to get most clues as to how she is really feeling. Like when she says “I’m fine.” She absolutely is not fine. She probably said I’m fine in a sharp tone. You might catch a glimpse of an eye roll. She may have a stern look on her face. Or even a sharp turn and walking away. All clues that she is NOT fine. Which brings us to number two.

When she says, “I’m fine.” She absolutely is not fine! So you already know by her body language as we just discussed, that she is not fine. What are you suppose to do? First, think what did you do? If you already know, You better do some backtracking and fast. If you have no idea or maybe you didn’t do anything wrong. It could be a number of things. She wants you to dig deeper. Ask questions. She may not tell you right away but she will tell you. Why do women do this? Often times, women are vulnerable. They are afraid to put their bare emotions out there. And by you continuing to ask and trying to find out what really is wrong, shows her you care. Any amount of effort you give, women love. Even if they don’t always show it.

If she changes her mind alot, it’s usually because she wants to make the right decision. The truth is, women overthink when it comes to things that matter. Have you ever been Christmas shopping with a woman? If you have, then you have witnessed her trying to find the perfect gift for someone she truly loves. She will go back and forth trying to decide on the perfect gift. She may change her mind ten times. That is how she thinks when trying to make any real decision that has any importance to her.

The little things matter. Surprise her one night by making her dinner. Make her favorite dish or her favorite dessert. A simple gesture goes so much further than an expensive gift. By making her dinner and adding something she loves, this shows her you care. This shows her you are putting forth effort. Remember when you were little, that gift you spent hours or days making for Mother’s Day or her birthday. She loved and treasured that gift far more than anything money could buy. Women are the same. They need to see you trying.

No excuses! Women absolutely hate nothing more than excuses from men. And really most of the time, an excuse is really another word for a lie. Lies break trust. And when the trust is gone you can tell her goodbye. She will leave at some point. So don’t do it! Period. It’s likely she will appreciate your honesty. And that … will score you mega points!

Learn how to say sorry. Women respect an apology with honesty. Sure she may act upset at the time for the minor thing you did. But deep down she does respect you. And really this goes back to “no excuses.” Just say, “I’m sorry. I completely forgot we had dinner plans tonight.” Instead of “I had to work late” or “traffic was bad” or any other cover story you can come up with. She will find out and it will get ugly.

Women want to be respected. Talk to her like she is your equal. Let her know her opinion matters. Listen to her when she tells you what she thinks. Treat her friends and family as well as you would treat your own. Respecting her friends and family is a way of showing her respect. Friends and family are crucial. One wrong word about you from friends and family could kill a potential budding romance.

Women want to be loved. As with everything else, it is how women feel. Make her feel loved in your presence. Do what you can to show her you care. You can love her all you want. But if she doesn’t FEEL loved around you. Chances are, she won’t stick around long.

See, women aren’t that difficult. You just need the right way of thinking and understanding. These are a few simple basics to women. All of these things are a recipe for success. And remember, it’s all about how they feel.